God is enough

I love listening to John Piper and one of his famous sayings is that God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him. I was thinking about that while going through this with my daughter and just asked the question "what does that mean?" Here's the answer if anybody ever has problems understanding piper, God is enough. In my situation he is enough. He will sustain me, He will provide for me, heal my hurt and forgive me when I fail. He is enough. He is sovereign over this and he will be all I need to get through. When I am tempted to rely on something else to get me through or distract me, he is enough. And through that, by making known that he is enough for me in this situation and every one from this point forward, God will be most glorified. At your lowest point, God is enough. When people see that God is enough at that time in your life then he will be most glorified in you. May my reliance on Christ be ever greater than it is now, may I truly know that HEe is enough for me in this situation and in every other, not so that I may be comforted but that he may be glorified.

Stuck, Angry, Helpless and Confused.

I have never in my life been made to endure such trying circumstances and I can't help but feel as though there is nothing I can do. So when there is nothing you do, faith becomes something you rely on heavily. What I'm learning is that I've had a hard time relying on faith for my whole life and so now, when I need it the most, I am lost. My mind says curse God, shake your fist and renounce all the things you said you believed..how could this happen? An innocent childs life hangs in limbo and multitudes are put through the pain and agony of a silly waiting game. Part of me says to God "Show me why I believe in you!" I write this as I am stuck...at home with a virus of my own, unable to be at my daughters side, my cellphone is dead and my charger is at the hospital. I can't go get my son because he would become sick and has already been exposed to the RSV and we can't risk anything infecting him. I am angry because of my impatience and my own sense of self importance. Impatience because this is taking so long and I am growing increasingly scared with every waking minute. My self importance because I thought something like this could never happer to me. So many people say that and yet so many can't grasp the concept that we are all succeptible to anything. I go back to faith because my anger and frustration does me no good it adds to the pain. So i cry out to God instead to please heal this little one that cannot fight for herself. How can I grasp that she is indeed God's to take if he chooses? How as a parent do you find a peace in that? I don't understand that but I do know that this did not take God by surprise. Maybe it's time to actually put my faith to action. To stop talking about it and start doing it. My peace (when I have it) comes in the gospel. In knowing that this is not my fault. There is nothing I did to cause this. My wife did nothing wrong to bring this on. We are a product of a broken, imperfect body, and indeed susceptible to disease, injury and death. But Jesus has redeemed us, and I am thankful and encouraged, as hard as it may be, that one day we will have a perfect body. I pray that my faith will increase as I wait and pray and cry.

The Assurance of Salvation

I confess that while I have come a long way in my journey to seperate myself from religion and fully embrace the truth of the Gospel that there are many times that I truly struggle with the things that I have been taught all of my life. Salvation being one of them. I had a good friend confess to me today that after 30 years of "playing" church that he finally accepted Christ. This came as a huge shock to me because I regarded him as a child of Christ. Through the conversation he told me that while he had accepted Christ at an early age that he had never developed a relationship with Him. His daily prayer life and worhsip activities were non-existant and he constantly struggled with sin. While I rejoiced at his boldness and honesty I couldn't help but wonder where the line was drawn between saved and lost. Is the belief in Christ at the root of our salvation or do our works indicate our true beliefs. If a person struggles with sin daily and is not able to overcome it does that make them lost even though they believe that Christ is the Son of God? Is it religion that teaches us that a prayer is all it takes to be saved? Is the struggle to establish a relationship with Christ truly an indicator of your salvation or is it simply a lack of understanding of the Gospel? The Gospel teaches us that we are free from the law and that we are forgiven from our sins. We should not be guilted by our sin to think that we are not saved but rather we should be convicted when we do sin and repent from those things. It does not say that we are perfect. Is sanctification not the process by which Christ transforms us to His likeness and thus our actions better reflect our understanding of the Gospel? I guess my struggle here is simply what qualifies you as being saved. I know that the Bible teaches that if you confess with your mouth and believe in your heart that Christ is Lord then you will be saved. But James also talks about faith and deeds and that faith without deeds is dead. I struggled for a long time with my salvation because I felt guilty that I was not the same perfect christian that I thought other people were. I'm finding out that we are all pretty messed up. But though I struggle it does not take away from the fact that Jesus is my savior. I know that ultimately only God knows who belongs to Him and who does not so at this point I will rejoice with my friend and encourage him as best I can. I guess I am realizing that while my awareness of the need for Gospel transformation came early, my understanding of it is just getting started.

Bringing up boys

I just wanted to share an exert from a book I've been reading by Dr. James Dobson titled Bringing Up Boys.

"We as parents are raising the next generation of men who will either lead with honor and integrity or abandon every good thing they have inherited, They are the bridges to the future. Nations that are populated largely by immature, immoralm weak-willedm cowardly, and self-indulgent men cannot and will not long endure. These types of men include those who sire and abandon their children; who cheat on their wives, who lie, steal, and covet; who hate their countrymen; and who serve no god but money. That is the direction culture is taking today's boys. We must make the necessary investment to counter these influences and to build within our boys lasting qualities of character, self-discipline, respect for authority, commitment to the truthm a belief in the work ethic, and an unshakable love for Jesus Christ."

I take a lot of pride in raising my children especially my son right now since he is old enough to understand what I teach him. I hope that fathers who read this would be encouraged to make the necessay investment in their sons lives if they have not already.

Goodbye '08

What an amazing year these last 12 months have been. Our lives have changed so drastically and when I look back at it I can clearly see God's hand at work in the lives of of our family. Family meaning my immediate little nucleus and extending to Melissa's side and my side. It's been an amazing journey to say the least. We started the year with anxiety from our old church, uncertain which direction to go. We were in integral part (or so we thought) of the weekly operations but felt called to something more. We left solid ground and found ourselves in downtown Macon full of uncertainties. The only thing we seemed sure of was that this was where God wanted us. To be apart of something new that He was building. To see his desire to redeem this city through all these people was amazing. So the first change of '08 came there. Shortly thereafter we found out we were pregnant with Baby #2. No one can really prepare for life with 2 kids. With 1 you can both share the duties needed to provide for that child but with 2 your contribtion individually to each grows tremendously. Sarah Kate was born 11/24/08 and despite a scare she is completely healthy. We saw 2008 bring both of our families together. Not that there was a divide outside the obvious geographical differences. We have been able to worship weekly as a family. I cannot tell you (whoever you are out there reading this) what that means to us to be able to have both of our families together especially for worship. Amazing, and again God at work. We saw 2008 bring me out of youth ministry and into leading a missional community from my home. I joined the praise band at NCCd which normally would have stroked my ego quite a bit (and still does to some degree) but has also taught(teaching really) me humility through my inexperience. We have seen our finances improve through the grace of God and a little discipline. But most importantly 2008 showed me the Gospel. While 2008 was a great year, the truth is that I am a still a sinner saved by the grace of God. Like Paul says, sometimes I even feel like the chief of sinners. What amazes me about the Gospel is not only the enormity of God but how I am still pursued by Him. But not just me. He pursues you as well. You who are reading this, He is pursuing you. His desire is to redeem you just like He has redeemed me. I like how paul writes in Romans that Gods love was demonstrated to us in this, that while we were still sinners Christ died for us. Amazing stuff. Happy New Year.

Merry Christmas

From our family to yours, we hope you have a wonderful, merry christmas. May we all remember that Christmas is not about presents, it's not about anything other than Christ. May Christ be the center of everything that your family does today. May we all remember that He is the present that we should be thankful for. That eternal life given by faith in Christ is what we are celebrating. The coming king who would bring salvation to all who place their faith in Him. Happy Birthday Jesus. We praise you and celebrate your coming and the salvation you bring. Thank you for the sacrifice that you made for us. May our lives be a reflection of our praise and adoration, and thankfulness to you and may you be glorified in all we do.

And then there were four

There really is nothing that someone who has gone before you can say to prepare you for life as a family of four. It seems as though everything has changed and we had only just gotten used to it the way it was. My daugther, my second child, was born this past Monday and though keeping my sanity has been a major focus I can honestly say that it has been pure joy. I wondered from the day we found out we were pregnant if I would be able to love another child the way I love Caleb. Would I be able to divide my time without leaving one out or feeling neglected? Would I favor one over the other? The truth is that 5 days in, none of these fears have materialized. It's really cool how our hearts can expand and our capacity for love increases. This blog has been my story of Gospel transformation and how I am beginning to see the Gospel for what it is. One of the things that I have come to understand is that the Gospel is love. The Gospel says that God so loved the world... As my heart increases it's capacity to love one more child it's pretty amazing to think about our heavenly Father and his capacity to love his children.